Monday, July 30, 2012

Grayson stats and a Kellen and Mommy update

I was trying to take a nap since all 3 boys are napping, but I felt the urge to document Grayson's stats up until now.  So, in regards to milk (the most important topic these days, lol) days 1-2 I was producing just about 1 mls of milk, which is why I substituted with formula the first few days.  I pumped every 2 hours around the clock. Then by day 3 I started making about 10 mls.  By day 4 I made 28mls, then day 5 40 mls.  Day 6 I was making 2 ounces where I continued that amount until day 8, then I jumped to 4 ounces days 9-10.  At this point I started going 3 hours between pumping sessions, still around the clock, then 5 ounces days 11-12, today (day 13) I started making 6 ounces.  I am now pumping every 3.5-4 hours.  I am not sure if I will continue to pump every 4 hours or if I will stick to the 3 hour intervals.  It is nice having that 4 hour break though!  I eat a bowl of oatmeal everyday and drink Mother' Milk tea and about 64 ounces of water a day. Quickly after we were home from the hospital, Grayson was obviously getting irritated with my slow milk production in the beginning I made the decision to do exactly what I did for Kellen, exclusively pump.  The way I look at it is that as long as I am giving my baby my milk I am doing exactly what I set out to do.  I want my baby to get breast milk. period.  For me, it doesn't matter how he gets it, as long as he gets it and is as healthy as can be.  With Kellen I was able to give him breast milk the entire first year of his life.  That was a huge accomplishment for me and I will strive to do the exact same for Grayson.

Grayson isn't eating as much as I am producing.  He is now eating about 3-3.5 ounces every 3-4 hours.  I would like for him to eat 4 ounces every 4 hours, so I am working at getting there.  But for now, I am able to freeze some milk.  He sleeps in 3 hour increments during the day, and at night he gets a little tricky.  He sometimes sleeps for 2 hours at a time, but then sometimes he will sleep 4 hours.  I am not sure why...still working on that.

He is just about out of his newborn clothes completely.  Actually at the hospital they skipped putting him in newborn diapers!  He was just already too big for them!  But since I have so many we are trying to use them up as quick as possible, I would hate to waste any diapers!  But soon I will pull out the size ones!  As for his clothes, he is wearing a different outfit everyday until he has worn each newborn outfit.  As he wears them I pack them up, or put some in a memory box.  I will donate all his clothes and any remaining diapers to the orphanages in Haiti. 

I know that no one will believe me, but I swear that there are times when he looks at me and smiles.  I know, I know, you're thinking "gas", I did too.  But, just today I was watching him and as soon as he saw my face ( I got about 1-2 feet away from him) and he smiled.  I backed away and he stopped smiling.  Then I came in close again and he smiled at me, looking right at me!  I did it a few times and each time he smiled.  So there, :), he WAS smiling AT me!!! 

He is making some really cute noises every once in a while.  On his 1 week birthday he made 3 cooing noises back to back.  Now he makes them a little more regularly.  Plus a super cute little yell that I LOVE!

Kellen is doing GREAT!!!!  I am so proud of him!  The first 10 days were rough, I will admit.  He was so hyper and completely beside himself.  After all our guests left and our house became quiet and calm again, Kellen calmed down.  Evan and I have noticed a huge change in him.  He has become very snuggly with both of us.  He likes to climb up on our laps and sit with us for extended periods of time now, he gives us hugs when we ask for them, including KISSES!!!!  He has stopped pitching fits when we don't want him to do something, he's done a complete 180 and is even more sweet than he was before Grayson came!  I think that as long as Evan and I give both boys equal attention then Kellen nor Grayson will feel left out.  That was my biggest concern.  I was terrified that Kellen would feel abandoned once Grayson came and watching him act out those first 10 days I thought for sure that he felt left behind.  That absolutely tore my heart out.  But now that isn't much of a concern for me anymore. :) As for what he is like as a big brother...he is REALLY GOOD!  He loves sharing his toys and his special blankie!  Kellen is constantly nicely placing his toys on Grayson.  Its really special and makes me SO happy to see!

Here's what Grayson look like once Kellen has shared his toys!  LOL!

Heading out today to help dad pick up the sticks after the rain storm.


"Don't bother me mom, Elmo's on!"

So, what its been like for me.  Besides falling in love all over again, feeling absolutely content as a mom of 2 boys and feeling like my life is now complete, there has been a ton of pain.  I got pretty beat up before the delivery (carrying a really big baby), during the delivery I got pretty beat up, and then after the delivery I tore out 2 stitches, took way too long to heal and then got double mastitis.  Its been really hard.  I wasn't able to walk for 2 weeks before having Grayson, then I couldn't walk for 1.5 weeks afterwards.  I was put on an antibiotic last week for the mastitis and am finally feeling better.  I've been able to pick Kellen up now, and get some house work done.  I went to the grocery store with Evan and Kellen on Saturday.  I was SO excited to get out of the house and actually do SOMETHING!  Even though it was just going to the grocery store! LOL!  We are putting our house up for sale, so today Evan and I got some staging done, and tonight once everyone is up from their nap I want to go for a walk!  Something I haven't done in a long time!  All in all, we are doing really well.  Everyday I feel stronger and more confident as a mom. :)

13 days later and 13 pounds to go.

Remember what I looked like the last time I wore this shirt...WHOA.

Saturday, July 28, 2012

We're Having a Baby! Part 3

We got home around 6:30 pm on Tuesday, and were greeted by a very hyper Kellen, and Stacey and Amber had prepared dinner for us.  The rest of the night is very blurry.  I remember eating, but thats about it.  It had been 48 hours with no sleep.  Grayson's first night home was rough.  As expected!!!  He was up every hour wanting to nurse.  We started having latch issues the first night home.  I think he was so hungry that he was getting impatient with me.  I was only producing a little colostrum, not near enough to satisfy this very hungry boy! 

Since the pediatrician gave us the ok to go home early, we were asked to take Grayson to his pediatrician the following day.  His bilirubin levels were a little elevated so they wanted to retest him.  Kellen's bilirubin levels were really high and required light therapy with a bili-blanket, so I knew that I had to do everything I could to make sure that Grayson didn't have to go through that.  So, I breast fed him as often as I could and even supplemented formula while I waited for my milk to come in.  When a baby has jaundice you have to try and get as much milk to the baby as possible to help flush out the bilirubin.  So that is what I did.  It was easy for me to supplement with formula.  All that matters to me is that my baby didn't have to get the needle stuck in his foot multiple times as he would be tested over and over for jaundice.  Evan stayed home with Kellen, and Stacey and I took Grayson to the pediatrician.

Sweet baby feet on the way to the pediatrician.  All I could think was, please don't hurt my baby when you prick this little foot!!!

At the pediatrician for the first time.  Grayson had dropped a little weight.  And I expected it.  He now weighed 8 lbs 14 oz.  Not bad at all!!!!


He got his foot pricked and didn't even cry!!!!  In fact as soon as it was done he passed out!

His results came back after a 20 minute wait.  His levels were still a little high, but not as they were in the hospital.  No more foot pricks were needed!!!!  All we had to do was keep watch on his skin color and keep breast feeding and supplementing!!!  I can't tell you how relieved I was that I had made the right decision to supplement!

Later that night we all just relaxed.  And took some more pics!  This was the first night that Kellen began checking his new brother out.  This was the moment I had been waiting for and a moment that I will never forget!!!

I can't believe this little monster was in my belly!!!

Grayson checking out his bed for the first time.

Stacey's last night with us. :(  She worked her butt off the entire 10 days she was with us!  I've never known anyone like her.  She is my rock.  I have so much love and respect for this woman.  I don't think she knows how much I need and appreciate her.  She took care of me and my family the entire time she was here.  She was my double!  I love that I have her!!!  

A happy Kellen!  

Grayson had to wear his tyedye onsie to see Aunt Tae Tae off...

Getting his bath...

And he hated it!

Stacey left on Saturday evening, around 5pm.  I cried like crazy!  I love it when I see her and I get so excited, but seeing her leave hurts so bad!  I miss her more and more.  I would give anything to live near my sister again.  An hour later our long time friend Tom Whitney came for a quick visit from Pittsburgh!  Kellen was incredibly hyper, he was upset that Stacey had left, and Evan and I were exhausted, but we REALLY missed Tom and was so happy that he was in town.  So, he came over for dinner.  He was so good with Kellen, and Kellen warmed up to him so fast!  We are sure that we must have been horrible hosts, but Tom is an awesome guy and I know that he wasn't offended by my lack of hospitality!

Tom left around 10pm that night so we all tried to get some sleep.  Charlene and Les were expected to arrive the following day.  So, Sunday morning and afternoon Evan, Kellen, Grayson and I were for the first time home on our own.  It wasn't too bad!  We just relaxed and spent some time together as a family of four.

Charlene and Les arrived around 7pm that night.

Sweet Grayson!  He always has his little hands folded just perfectly around his face!

PapPap and Kellen time.

Char's 2 boys...

Char's 3 boys...

Grayson is 1 week old!!!!

The cutest video!!!  8 day old Grayson.

Martz Family picture.  Too bad Hyla wasn't here.  Look at my crazy Kell-Zilla!  

My little family, plus Kaden minus Sophia.

Kellen LOVES hanging out with the boys.  He wanted to help them with all the boy stuff.  So cute!

My sweet baby boys!!!  

I think that Kellen loves his brother...don't you? :)

So, I think that's it.  All caught up.  Its been an amazing journey so far.  I know its just begun! I hope I've captured all the details and hope to never forget the most beautiful couple weeks.  Today is July 28 and Grayson's umbilical stump fell off!  But, I did get tons of pictures with it on.  One more milestone which completes his newborn phase.  And he is just about out of his newborn clothes, some wont fit at all, like his onsies are way too small.  He practically skipped wearing newborn diapers, but since I had so many I am trying to use as many up as I can.  So, he is now wearing 0-3 clothes and size 1 diapers.  He is already growing up too fast.

I love my boys!  Thank you Evan, Kellen, Stacey, Jen, Jason, Charlene, Les, Amber and Hyla.  I am forever grateful.  I love you all with all my heart.  You've made these blog entries possible. :)  I can't wait to write more!!!

Friday, July 27, 2012

We're Having a Baby! Part 2

So, at 12:15am we arrive at the hospital (Evan went 70 the whole way there!).  I can feel the contractions coming on every 4 minutes.  We park the car and bam, there is another one.  I was getting worried that I was going to have the baby in the car! We were going to  go to the emergency entrance, but I didn't want Evan to have to leave my side, so I made myself walk into the hospital.  Evan was trying to help hold me up, just as we were crossing the street bam, another one.  I just hunched over and continued to walk.  We got in and immediately the receptionist knew what was going on and she grabbed a wheel chair for me.  Evan quickly zoomed down the corridor and got me to the L&D floor.  I got in, a little paper work was done.  I have no idea why I had to do my paper work now!  I was having contractions every 2 minutes and had to stop talking just to be able to breathe!!  After all the paper wok was done I was taken to the pre-op area.  I was hooked up to the monitors and we heard the heartbeat, just as perfect as could be.  I was now worrying about his heart rate during my contractions, but he was strong and didn't waver at all.  We sat there for what seemed to be forever, but it was only 15 minutes!  I really wanted to see when Stacey and Jen were going to be there, I needed my girls!  But, they were with Kellen, which was really putting my mind at ease since I was also worried about Kellen freaking out since he had just been taken out of his bed and driven to our friend's house.  A nurse came in and checked.  By 12:30am I was 5cms dilated and 100% effaced.  I was admitted.  I was asked to walk to my room.  I will never under estimate my strength again.  At the time I didn't think about anything except getting to my room with a gold plated epidural waiting for me but I had to walk through each contraction down the winding hallways to my room.  All I kept reminding myself of was a story a friend had reminded me of; women who had to give birth alone in the woods with just a leather strap to bite on to help ease the pain.  My God, I could walk to my room with my head held high and suck up the pain.  After all I would get an epidural!  I needed to remember what this is like, what it's like to REALLY feel my baby coming into our world.  I remember feeling so blessed to be able to experience this.  At 1:00am, I was taken up to my room, changed and situated in bed.  At this point the contractions were coming on every 1-2 minutes.  They hurt so bad, I could hardly breathe!  The nurse started to try and calm me down during them, but when she was left the room I was a mess!  The IV was inserted in my arm, up high, in my forearm.  It was so uncomfortable!  And I felt that stupid needle the entire time!  My dr came in and asked if I wanted an epidural, I told her yes, as soon as possible.  The anesthesiologist came in and told me that he was about to head in to surgery and that I would have to wait an hour for the epidural.  *sigh*.  Ok.  I told Evan I could do this, but he needed to help talk me though each one.  He tried to help, but my goodness I was a mess!  An hour came and went.  Two hours came and went.  I was starting to get mad.  I was told an hour, and now its been 2 hours, I am ready for my epidural NOW!!!

At 3:15am I finally got my epidural.  R.E.L.I.E.F.

Looking back, I am glad that Stacey and Jen weren't there for the contractions show!  I was a raging lunatic!!!  They left a wide awake and very hyper Kellen with Jason and arrived in my room at 3:45am.  We all hung out and talked until I got so tired I had to close my eyes.  Thank God I opted for that epidural!

At around 7:30am I felt a need to push.  So, that's what I did!  I pushed and pushed and pushed.  I tried so many different pushing positions.  An hour later, nothing.  I was just completely wiped out and feeling very nauseous.  I seriously could do no more.  I laid on my side, got a shot of Zofran (the same medicine I took early in my pregnancy for the morning sickness).  As soon as I got that shot I got really sick.  After that went away I passed out.  Everyone except Evan left the room for about 30 minutes and I slept, hard.

Around 9:00am I felt strong and started pushing again. Jen, Stacey and Evan all took turns holding my ankles to help me push.  I hand the best support team!  I am SO glad that they were there for me.  I will never forget this day.  Even through all the pain and uncomfortableness, I enjoyed every single moment!

And finally, at 10:38am Grayson was here!!!!!!!!!!!  I burst into tears.  I couldn't believe it, he was finally here.  The nurse lifted my gown and laid his warm body on mine.  I scooped him up, umbilical cord still attached and cried such happy tears!  What a beautiful moment, my God, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!!!!

After some sweet bonding time the nurses weighed Grayson.  I had NO idea what a big baby I was now holding in my arms.  I knew he was going to be bigger than Kellen, who came 3 weeks early and weighed 6 lbs 10 oz, 19 inches long.  I knew it because I could feel him in my belly, I could feel the weight that I was carrying around.  They put him on the scale...

WHAT?!?!?!?  9 pounds?!?!?!  I thought that the nurses were playing a joke on me, so they did it again.  And his official weight was 9 lbs 9.4 ounces.  22 inches long.  Unbelievable!  My big boy! 

He scored perfectly on his APGARs and was then placed for the first time in Evan's arms.

We took turns holding him and studying each little tiny feature and loving him more and more.

We took a picture of my girls...

Holding hands.  Look how blue he still was!

 Our perfect baby boy Grayson!!!

After about 3 hours we were taken the the Mommy Baby unit.  Shortly after arriving Grayson got his first bath and I changed him for the first time.  I have to admit, I was a little nervous changing his diaper!  It was much different than changing Kellen's diaper!  And he peed on me!!!  His first night he was up a lot.  As to be expected, he was up every hour- hour and a half.  We were nursing SO well!  He latched right on like a pro!  I know it wasn't because of me, he just knew how to do it! 

This was his actual first outfit after his first bath and diaper change.

More snuggles...

 Loving his Aunt Tae Tae...

The second day in the hospital.  Everything was going really well.  Grayson was circumcised and his hearing was tested.  He did SO well!  Such a strong little boy!  They tested his bilirubin in the hospital, and it turned out to be just a little high.  However, Dr. Pascal said that it wasn't high enough to be concerned, but he wanted Grayson's pediatrician to see him on Wednesday for his check up and another bili test.  We were offered to either stay one more night or be discharged.  I was ready to go home...sort of...I felt scared, tired and hurting, but I missed Kellen.  So I decided to go home.  Evan brought Kellen to visit me and I got my first taste of what our life would be like...extremely hectic!!!  BUT- a new life and one that I wouldn't change for anything in the world.

Stacey took Kellen home while Evan stayed with me.  She and Amber came to our home and prepared dinner.  I dressed Grayson in his coming home outfit.

In the car and on our way home!!! it begins.  My new life as a mom of 2 boys. I am terrified!  I don't know how to juggle giving both boys all the attention they need and deserve.  I am worried that Kellen will feel left out.  After all, all his life until now its been so quiet and all about him.  Once things settle down a little, after all our company leaves I am going to work very hard at putting together some type of schedule.  But for now I am going to keep my chin up and enjoy these first days as a mommy of tow boys.  Even though it is insanely hectic, I know that these days will be over before I know it and I don't want to miss a single second.

Thank you Evan for making me a mommy again.  I am so thankful for my boys.  God is good!

Soon I will update with our first night home, more adventures with Aunt Tae Tae, Grayson's first drs appointment, and our visit with Tom Whitney, and Char Char and PapPap.

Ok, one more picture!!!